Hello. My name is Emily. I think there is something wrong with me. I am 50 years old. I am from?Illinois born and raised by a very good, loving family. I am very nice and sweet to everybody -- from people at the grocery store to my place of employment to my neighbors to my friend.......ALL EXCEPT ONE FRIEND. My friend, who I will call Steve, I am SO MEAN TO. ****Steve and I chat via online everyday on the computer.*****I purposely try to come up with things to say to Steve to hurt him, hurt his feelings, make him feel bad, "choke him up", and most of all make him feel like he's a born loser who doesn't have a reason to live. I say the most hurtful things to Steve hoping that I've hurt him to the point of him crying and ruining his day. This gets worse. Steve has cerebral palsy and is profoundly deaf. Now, just because Steve has these two impairments does not hold him back. He works, he lives alone, he drives a truck, he attends football games. Gets worse. Steve is an angel to me, a doll. He is so good to me. He will send me money if I am in a crunch. He sends me friendship cards via mail (we live in different states), he is just an all-around beautiful man with an beautiful heart. Steve NEVER says bad things to me; in fact, just the opposite. He will tell me to have a great day; and when I send him a picture of me, he'll tell me I'm pretty. HE IS ALWAYS KIND TO ME. I am so mean to Steve, mean to the point of abuse. He tells me he cries because I've hurt him. I am sorry for my long post. I think I need to see a psychiatrist to find out why in the world I do this to Steve. I have no money to see a psychiatrist. Any ideas from you readers why I do this to my friend??? Please help me. Thank you