From a young age, I've had these urges to do things and I'm afraid it will lead to socially unacceptable things or things that will harm others. These urges are always changing, but my current ones include the following. Before I go to bed, I have to touch the highest point of my window sill with both hands. I also have to turn off my light with one hand, turn it on again and then turn it off with my other hand. When I take a shower, I have to turn off the taps, open the shower curtain, then turn the shower on and off again. A big one that has been bothering me is that when I hear or see a phrase that interests me, I have to count the number of letters until I find the middle letter. I also like and look for odd numbers; I want something to be in the middle of pairs. I haven't really talked to anyone about these habits. I have suspected myself of having OCD at one point, but it isn't like I have to keep anything in order. I'm not afraid that bad things will happen if I don't keep with these habits, I just feel like they are necessary, like brushing my teeth or combing my hair. So why am I doing these things? I'd like to minimize my urge to do them and perhaps get rid of the need to do them all together.
Responses (2)
I find this really interesting, I'd say OCD but talk to a dr just to have someone to discuss with. When I was very young I had certain habits but the less I thought about them, the less I did them, like closing the front door, opening then closing once more. The human brain is such an amazing thing, don't be scared of discovering things about yourself. You sound quite intelligent so maybe study something with patterns like maths to see if it helps or learn a new skill like reading music as patterns sound key to how your brain works.
I also have to ask, do you really think it could be OCD? I've always thought of OCD as being extremely intruding on daily routines, something that people can not get off their minds, and my habits aren't really like that.
it would seem like its just something that has gotten in your path and it could be aggression anxiety something thats not allowing you to do things on your own it could be a way of the thinking and how to look at things probably just the way you want to have things without really wanting to think about might try to see a therapist but mabe to deal with things are really hard sense you don't know where its coming from it doesn't sound like ocd but might be the start of something like it
Thank you for your answer. :) I've never really considered the fact that it could be anxiety related, but this comment made me think about it a bit. I get quite stressed out easily, so maybe I subconsciously find these habits coping techniques?
Thank you for your answer. :) I think I'll definitely try things such as reading music and see how that works out.