why do I feel like I have two sides, and one side is winning? I feel like I have a soft personal side that is kind to everyone then a side that is mean and the mean side is coming out more than the soft personal side, my girlfriend is about to leave me because of it, it's been happening for a long time and i'm just feed up with it I can't lose her I love her so much but I can't help my self... this side comes back and sometimes this other side of me just starts yelling random letters and numbers that I have never heard or said before and I ask my girlfriend to repeat the numbers and one of the numbers where a date the date was of some secret mission of the us that no one has heard of then the next one consists of numbers and the numbers lead to the cure of cancer... I am acting weird and I kinda knew that something was up. help please