... what to wear, tell me what to spend, wouldn’t allow me to say hi to friends, isolated me from my family and friends, but yet, he would take care of me and make sure I’m ok. He barely did half of the things I’ve mentioned a month before I dumped him, but my dad’s friend saw him hit me recently. My ex now feels bad about breaking up with me. He was hurting himself to feel the same I did when he used to hit me out of anger. He claimed it was fear as well because he had nightmares of me dying. He wants to surprise me to take me back, and I don’t know if he’s really changed like he said he is. Was breaking up with him worth it?
Responses (3)
How much is your life worth? That's how much it was worth it to break up with him. Does that answer your question?
Over time in answering questions on 3 different sites, literally thousands, I have answered a lot from abused women. They ALL sound the same. The females all say the same thing. The bottom line is they are involved with psychologically unsound men who are liars, abusers, controllers and if a woman finds or accepts excuses she, too, is as psychologically unsound as he is. They will all wind up at a women's shelter beaten down with nothing but a child or two who are traumatized and who may never recover from the trauma and violence.
The men ALWAYS say they are sorry and want the woman back. They don't want her not letting him control her. They are ALWAYS sorry...until the next time.
https://
www.yourtango.com/experts/marni-feuerman/signs-abusive-relationship
https://
streetsmartwomen.com/relationship-violence-warning-signs/
To click on the above links and I highly suggest you do, remove the space after the //
Cease all contact let your parents know he is dangerous and to keep him away.
Consider therapy to see what made you accept him in the first place, you dont want to repeat it. I encourage you to cease ALL communication from here on out and change your phone number.
Wishing you a much happier and safer future!
This control freak felt entitled to keep you on a leash. What does this tell you about him respecting you?
"He would hit me", "my dad’s friend saw him hit me recently", "he used to hit me out of anger"; You were his punching ball, his emotional garbage can.
" My ex now feels bad about breaking up with me". The poor sod; don't fall for the insinuation that this is your fault.
Each time you accept his "most sincere" apologies and his solemn assertions never to do it again, you strengthen his abusive attitude, and, even worse, you lose more of your self respect.
So, move on and don't look back. Be glad it's over.