Hey there.. Now let's cut to the chase. I'm not the appropriate size for my age. I'm +10kgs from the average weight. I have thought of an eating disorder or simply ending my life. I have moved away from suicide and will never go back to that. So don't worry about that part. I have researched diets and then other things say diets only make you fat. Also I started starving myself and read more about it saying starving yourself makes you fat aswell since you will (in the end) give over to hunger and eat a lot. I don't want to tell my mum since she will think there is something seriously wrong. I'm going to have counselling, but I'm scared to tell the person everything since the parents beg to hear it all. I walk around and see girls in tight dresses exposing their bodies or crop tops and short pants. I'm the awkward one, wearing jeans and a jacket exposing my chubby body. I'm not akisng got you to day 'Girl you are beautiful just the way you are!' Because I'm over that. I've been told that a million time snad IT DOENST HELP! Sorry.. I'm scared I will be a virgin forever or never be whistled at or never get a flirty text from a class mate. I want to be a skinny girl even if it means to be a whore. I just want beauty. I watched a video about a bulimia story. The girl hot really thin but ended up in hospital. I just want to be thin. I have started eating less and healthier. I'm trying to exercise but with low iron I'm havering trouble too. Loosing my breath easier, also my bones crack whenever I stand or crouch or squat. Technically whenever I move my bones. I have a crush who everyone says has a crush on my Ex-BFF who is perfect. Well kinda. She is sweet, talented and popular. Although she isn't the skinniest, she is GORGEOUS. I'm around her size but it's more my thighs I'm hating on. I see girls older and they are half my size. I had a BFF who is SUPER skinny. She was popular and guys loved her. I just want to be thin. So I'm asking for advise. How to be thin, exercise routines, day plans, meal things. I don't know, something that will help AND the truth.