Ok, very awkward situation here. A few months ago I started grad school in a new state where I don't know anyone. I met a girl in one of my classes and began to develop a crush on her. I knew that she was gay (because of my awesome gaydar) and decided to try to get to know her. We began to chit-chat and I would catch her looking at me during class...this led to prolonged eye contact, butterflies and conversations initiated by her. At the time, I felt that we shared a very strong connection (hind-sight's 20/20 right?), I got up the nerve to message her and ask her to get drinks. She immediately responded with her number and the time and place we should meet up. I met her at the bar and found out we needed to pull tables together because she had some friends coming later....uh oh. Within the first 20 minutes she mentioned she had a girlfriend, so naturally I 180 from crushing to just trying to develop a friendship, I let her know that I was gay too and she responded with surprise..... uh oh again. However, the night is going great, her girlfriend and friends eventually show up and I got along great with all of them. They invited me back to their place for a late night party and asked me to stay the night, which I didn't stay for obvious reasons. I never once let on to my feelings for her and left that night feeling that I just made a bunch of friends. I had so much in common with her and her girlfriend, we were laughing non stop the entire night. The next day she texted me telling me how much fun they had and we made plans for the following week. We continued talking the next few days, however, the day we were supposed to hang out again I notice that she is giving me the cold shoulder in class. I take that as a hint and don't ask about the plans. I saw her later on and she asks to get together and study a few day later. I say yes, and get in touch with her the day she wanted to study and find out that she is busy and can't until the weekend. At this point, communication has slimmed. I actually see her out the night we initially planned to study...the night she was 'busy' and needless to say, it was a bit awkward. Her girlfriend was excited to see me but she was pretty distant. I can take a hint. Now I don't hear from her at all and when we do talk in class it's basically chit-chat, I even overheard her making plans to study/hangout with other classmates. She acts like we never hung out. Since the night we went out, I have not asked her to hang out again because I respect the relationship that she is in and feel like if they want to get together they will invite me. We went from having an awesome time to barely speaking now. I'm not sure what happened and now I don't know how to act around her. I know this is a situation that I should just leave alone and let be, but honestly, I loved her people, we got along great and there is no reason we shouldn't be friends. Just an FYI: I have not been over-bearing or pushy, she texts me first, she initiates most conversations and she made the last two plans that she broke...without apology or letting me know...I was just left to assume it wasn't happening. Dude, what happened?!
Not sure what to do in this situation?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by RightVinyl
- Topics:
- girl, friend, gay, friendship, schools, girls, lesbian, relationships, awkward
Details:
Responses (2)
Honestly, I've no idea. But I think that maybe you offended her by not going round to her house with her friends and girlfriend that first night? Maybe she thought you weren't interested and were just in it for fun. Maybe she thought that you weren't interested in the friendship? I've no idea, sorry.. But those are just some ideas, hope I wasn't too late!