It sort of been there all my life. No matter how hard I tried to fit in, be nice and listen to people- find common goals and hobbies, I always ended up alone (the type that hangs around a group of people only to find out that they go out without inviting you).
Now I'm 21 and in college. I can't say I have real friends but only close acquaintances. I'm a girl and as a normal person I hoped I could have a relationship, you know- find love. But it's like every time I get close to a guy and he shows the slightest interest, the minute I reciprocate , he just acts distant all of a sudden and cease any contact.
I believe I'm quite average looking, but not bad, I try to stay healthy and be fun around people but it just...doesn't click. Failing to make human contact made me really depressed (diagnosed)- I feel like I barely want to live, there is no one there that wants me in their life (including a parent who abandoned us) and it just feels like this is going to be for the rest of my life, like a sort of curse I got hanging on my back that tells people "beware". I don't know if I can keep on living like that.
What would you recommend? Anyone that can share a similar story?
Loneliness curse?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by norry45
- Topics:
- life, people, listen, always, goal, relationship, sort, matter, curse
Answers (4)
I'm a 17 year old girl and am in High School and I'm lonely too. I find I have difficulties connecting with people simply because I have nothing in common with them. Sure I got friends, but the only reason they hang with me is because they're my boyfriend's friends (my boyfriend is they only one they actually wants to hang with me). I am so out of touch with people around me and they don't get me. I try being nice and stuff but I don't know if I just say the wrong things or something but they always drift away from me.
I don't know if this is because I'm ADHD and ASD, but people who are the same age as me don't seem to wanna be around me.
I don't know how to help you because everyone else is the problem, not you, but my advice is try hanging out with someone who's not your age (seems to work for me) and find someone who has the same interests in you.
There's nothing wrong with you- it's just the other people don't think all that well.
There is always someone out there- you jus have to find them.
All that I can say is that I know exactly how you feel and struggled with depression for a long time. For a person who found light at the end of the tunnel I strongly suggest that you take a minute to really get to know yourself and who you are because I suspect that abandonment issues lead you to not love yourself. This is unacceptable because as you tried convincing everyone you really are a great person. I'm 22 and a junior in college and I can say that until you're okay with being lonely and being in your own company god will keep challenging you by making you lonelier. Turn to god, release your worries and trust. Trust that tomorrow will be better even if it never seems to happen, trust that your worth while even if it is just in your eyes and gods and trust that you're not alone because life can still surprise you, but life only happens when you least expect it to so get distracted and one day it will just work out. I promise.
Thank you for you words, I will keep on hoping things get better and as you said, try to accept what I have and learn to live with it.
I concur somewhat with the previous answer. God can and does mend all hurts. I have struggled at times with depression and thoughts of worthlessness. These are voices of the enemy in your ear. You in tell those voices to shut up. God made His creation above the voices of the enemy. You are a worthwhile and worthy person! Believe it! It is true. Turn to God with your loneliness. Tell Him your inner struggles. Become in love with God. Once you feel comfortable in your own skin, it will be much easier to have meaningful relationships. Get a passion for something or better yet ask God what He would have you to do. He is GREAT at giving us purpose! You know He created you to accomplish Great things.
Let passion rise up in you. Be passionate about something. Spread life everywhere you go. Don't just tell someone you love them; demonstrate it. Find pleasure in making someone else smile. We are not just here for ourselves. We are created to help others and serve others. Try smiling even when you don't feel like it. Your life can change. We have to believe that things can be better. Don't doubt it. Believe. You can do it.
Thank you so much for the kind words!