It sort of been there all my life. No matter how hard I tried to fit in, be nice and listen to people- find common goals and hobbies, I always ended up alone (the type that hangs around a group of people only to find out that they go out without inviting you).
Now I'm 21 and in college. I can't say I have real friends but only close acquaintances. I'm a girl and as a normal person I hoped I could have a relationship, you know- find love. But it's like every time I get close to a guy and he shows the slightest interest, the minute I reciprocate , he just acts distant all of a sudden and cease any contact.
I believe I'm quite average looking, but not bad, I try to stay healthy and be fun around people but it just...doesn't click. Failing to make human contact made me really depressed (diagnosed)- I feel like I barely want to live, there is no one there that wants me in their life (including a parent who abandoned us) and it just feels like this is going to be for the rest of my life, like a sort of curse I got hanging on my back that tells people "beware". I don't know if I can keep on living like that.
What would you recommend? Anyone that can share a similar story?