I have really bad mood swings.. when Im in depression I don't want to eat, I don't want to get up I just want to sleep and I have had a lot of self harm problems..I just want to die and then it will be over. Everything is just falling out of my arms, everything puts me into more deep depression,I feel hopeless and its like my brain is turned off even my moves slow-es down..I had gastric pains of stress, I had headache and I thought it was tumor I went to doctors searching for illness all over my body but here was nothing serious just stress caused stuff I mentioned...one time it was so bad I wasn't able go to school and it lasted for about a month or more I was almost kicked out of school...everyone though I didn't go there for purpose in reality it was awful pains and all that dropping out stressed me even more.. most of the time I feel depressed for a week or two.. and later it gets so much better and its like Im falling in love with all the world around me I can feel that my senses become stronger.. I can see brighter and etc. I become spontaneous, impulsive like my brain is working so fast I can keep up with it I go from doing one thing to another,I become sarcastic and laugh at everything, dress revealing and actually as a person Im shy but when "that thing" gets me I become so confident and brave.. I go hugging everyone like I love everyone.. but at the same time every simple thing when people don't agree with me or something I start to scream, slam doors, Im clingy as hell.. I argue a lot and I become so annoying people and my class friends notice I can't sit or stand still..even when I was little I were so impulsive and restless at store that later seller who knew my father and saw me then told him there was something wrong with me...this last for about a week and sometimes in the middle it can mix up like for 1-3 days my moods changes really fast just from nowhere.. I can't concentrate at school because of these things..My mother had mood swings all her life and doctors said she had something like personality disorder but its more like character departures..I never had normal relationship with her because she was beating me a lot when I was a child.. my father thinks I made this up.. my grandma from my father's side had psychological problems and her son my uncle my father's brother has schizophrenia... Im really afraid that it could be serious.. PLEASE ANSWER, SORRY THAT THIS IS SO LONG.. THANK YOU.
Responses (2)
I understand exactly what your going through.I'm in a similar situation and when I talk to others about it I know they think I'm crazy. In answer to your question, It's definitely not normal. It sounds like bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder. It's hard being a teenager with this because it can't technically be diagnosed until your brain is fully developed at around 18. I was recommended to keep a mood journal and it really helped. Write down everything you feel and what triggered it. Soon enough you'll be able to see how long your depressed stage is and how long your manic phase is, that is if it's bipolar disorder like it sounds to be.
I don't want to be all generic and say you should get help or ask to someone you trust. I know that sometimes you don't have anyone that could understand what your going through. Just make sure if you really get serious about suicide, that your surrounded by people. Finding something your really passionate about can help during your depressed phase. I took up painting so I can do it whenever I feel horrible. Also if you could find some sort of mood stablizer that would help. If you can't get a prescription one maybe try some homeopathic stuff. Sorry this is a really long response...bottom line, your not normal but there are a lot of people like you. I hope you get better soon :)
this definitely sounds like bipolar and/or ADHD. As you get older it may be easier to control, but you have to work at it. There are many people who have ADHD or Bipolar and function just fine. Many are prescribed medication to help them control their ups and downs. Sometimes you can learn that on your own.
" it can't technically be diagnosed until your brain is fully developed at around 18" I never heard of it ? By the way thanks for journal idea :)