I have been with my boyfriend for about 2 years now. Overall he is a nice guy and works a blue collar job. I work in corporate. There has always been things that make me question his fidelity like seeing that he reaches out to girls online. I have confronted him about his and he said that he will change. Anyway, my birthday was this weekend and he took me to a lounge. He paid for everything and the cost was about $200 and I had a good time. There were some “Spanish” girls dancing and he was looking at them but I didn’t bring it up because it was my birthday and I didn’t want to accuse him (we are black/ not that it matters). Our waitress, also Spanish, really did a nice job and gave brought out a slice of cake. She was a lovely girl. My boyfriend told me he tipped her 70 dollars (which I though was excessive but I let it go). Today he asked me to help him find his money clip. I found it and see two of her cards in there. This just reminded me of the tip and I brought it up saying I had a really good time but do you think the $70 was a little much? He starts to ask me if I am jealous (which I hate because I give him many passes). I don’t want to deal with this down the line. I find that he is so quick to call me jealous a little unsettling and disrespectful. I feel like he probably wanted to impress her and told me that he told her when he has his birthday he wants her to but the one that that puts it together.
Responses (1)
It was an excessive tip but there are mitigating circumstances.. he was obviously having a good time (with you), saw that you were having a good time too, I presume you both had a few drinks, enjoy a great meal, were lucky to have a really good waitress and he wanted to amke you feel special which I think he did. He might have given a good tip to either impress you or to say a big thanks to the waitress for treating you both well on your birthday. I don't think it's your jealousy that is the problem has he has admitted his eyes "wander" occasionally but a lot of guys do that without taking it any further. Two of her cards in his wallet and not one is a good sign, they probably came with the receipt which would be in his wallet and two cards means she just grabbed them and put them with the reciept, just one might mean she thought about it first if you see what I mean. Either way it is probably purely innocent, she was the waitress that night, she gave the reciept so her card in with the reciept.
I think you're just reading too much into it, let it go for now but don't let his eyes wander too often, make sure he's still respecting you.