She’s my best friend and we get on great i.e. we talk everyday and we try to hang out whenever we can. she’s become such a huge part of my life that its weird not to talk to her each day however I can't tell her how I feel because it would be weird after and I don't want to risk what we already have plus me and her are too different culturally for anything long term to happen since I’m Korean and she is Pakistani Muslim and since she’s never had a boyfriend I don't want her having her heart broken.
so recently she’s got a job and she keeps telling me how nice everyone treats her especially the guys like one guy calls her his sister and they always mess about at work, I know I have no right to tell her who she can be friends with but I can't help but think that maybe she will find that she would prefer them over me because they are all bigger and better looking than me and come from similar cultural backgrounds to her, I know she’s not like that but I keep thinking that its only a matter of time before she decides to date one of them since they have so much more in common and then I’ll get phased out of her life
On the other hand when we are together we always tease and bicker with each other over anything. we constantly hit/poke each other. at night we always talk on msn and she even says that she only goes on to talk to me and only bickers and punches me as well cos she doesn’t do that to other people.
sorry about the essay it’s just been bugging me alot and I don’t know what to do about it cos I can’t tell her nor can I figure a way to deal with this cos I know its unhealthy to be so attached to her...so any help would be helpful