My life has turned really dull. It used to be different. I was more focused a year back on what I wanted, and I used to work for it. Now, I am really lacking that motivation, to get things moving like I was capable of doing before. I don't know how this has come about to be, and I can't recall how I had done it before. I'm having a really hard time figuring out what's changed. I'm procrastinating way too much now, I've had a falling out with some friends and can't seem to be too bothered about it. Mostly I'm BORED, which is kind of depressing. But I'm not depressed, because I've known what that's like, but at least even then I could channel that feeling into something productive and get on with things. Now, there's nothing.
One thing I know for sure is that I used to be very obsessive by nature. That's sort of changed, but I can't claim it's for the better, because at least then my mind was onto something. Now I feel entirely aimless, annoyed, and bored out of my wits. I'm a 19 year old college student, by the way, and I'm really freaking out over whether or not there is any way out of this. So please, help me
I'm not happy anymore. Help, please?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by drakeypoo
- Topics:
- life, work, happy, different, depression, depressed, dull, psychology, help, sad
Responses (5)
It happens mate, happened to me at the same age as you are now. I solved it by finding a new focus and for me that meant travel. I cleared my debts, rented a small flat to minimize my bills and rent and took every chance to go somewhere. Didn't matter where I just had to go somewhere. I've visited most places in Europe and walked god only knows how many kilometeres around the med. Usually I 'd just go to the airport and ask what flight was leaving in 30 minutes and had empty seats (in order to get a bargain) and take it. All I'd have was carry on and a few credit cards. Once I got there I'd pick up a book or two in the airport and start walking into the nearest town to see what happened. Broadened my mind in ways I can't even explain as well as giving me a new outlook on life and people.
My advice to you.. drop out for a year or two, get a job even a Mc job and chill, read, take up a hobby, get out of your parents house and live, just live, you're 19 you are now the fittest you are ever going to be and the most adaptable you'll ever be, you have more freedom at your fingertips than you can imagine so take advantage of it.
I'm married now (very happily too), I have kids, 3 jobs and a whole mess of responsibilities and I'm honestly happy because when someone says "i'd love to visit that or this place" I can say, "Done that."
Take a leap in the dark and see what happens but cover your bases, pay any debts, always buy a return ticket and make sure you've got credit. It's nice to be reckless but be sensible too... and yeah, that's the "Old man" in me giving advice because that was a f*ckin' hard lesson for me to learn.
Hey, it's my pleasure and for the record I was a small town boy too. There is always the horizon, go see what's on the other side. Take a chance.. got a car? Load it up with fuel chuck a sleeping bag in the back and go drive till the tanks empty then fill it up and drive on. Stop for the night, have a brew and chill, talk to people and if the mood takes you drive on a little more.. you can always drive back.
Good to hear you like your studies, they are important, no one can ever tell you different but you can always take a year out to get a bit of maturity before going back to hit the books again. Not everyone is ready for college straight out of high school some people (including myself) needed a year or so to grow a bit.
But, I don't want to lecture you, you've got your own path just make sure it's a good one and remember you can, you really can, change the road you're on and it doesn't matter where you live or what you're born with.
Thre are a few reasons why this can be happening. At 19, even though it has slowed down you, are still growing and also maturing. There may have been something that deeply distrubed you emotionally, but consciously you were not aware of the extent of its impact. It might be falling out with your friends, or that could have been caused by your changing, or it might be something related to your normal life, such as recognition of the way your life path is likely to plan out has been a turn off.
On the face of it, what you decribe well corresponds to too much work and not enough play. Problem is without having a good idea of the cause, then how can one propose a solution? Unfortunately its upto you to discover the cause, with professional help if you think that would be useful for that.
What is generally a help is doing new things. Change your sport or take one up if you don't have one. Join some kind of club, seek new but healthy stimulus. Do a little benevolent work with the down and outs. That has a double whammy effect, not only showing you how well off you are in comparison, but where you might end up if you cannot get yourself sorted out. In short, don't just sit there moping, get active differently.
Wow. Guess I never actually imagined overstepping the bounds of what I was imagining life to be...until now. I needed this to realize there's much more to it. I don't want to drop out, I love what I'm studying too much. Yet, moving out and trying things out on my own sounds exciting. And viable. Traveling seems like an expensive option, yet I live in a big town and I never thought to explore... not even once. Well, thank you. Glad to hear about your life, too.