I was recently diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder, I've always known that I have anxiety and have been living with it for many years but up until recently it was manageable. Once it started getting bad, I spent most days crying, I had seriously intrusive thoughts and panic attacks. The ones that really managed to get to me were those of family members dying and that I don't think I love my boyfriend. I know that death is inevitable and I know that I love my boyfriend and he is the person that I plan to spend the rest of my life with, but unfortunately the thoughts stuck with me and for some reason the thought about my boyfriend is the most frequently recurring thought. The problem is the thoughts feel so real and it is beginning to worry me that even though I know the way I feel that I am starting to doubt my feelings because the thoughts are so persistent. After a while I managed to stop feeling so anxious, but now I feel like I may not be feeling at all. Things that would normally upset me, don't. I find myself not caring or worrying about anyone. I don't want to see my friends and it doesn't phase me if I offend them and they potentially could stop speaking to me. I'm just wondering whether or not this is a defense mechanism to combat the anxiety or if there is genuinely something else that is the matter with me?