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I know this girl at church, and I really love her! I have (kind of) known her for a few years. I only ever see her on Sunday. I am 16 she is 16, I can't date. I really want to get to know her better. And I am pretty sure she likes me too.
This is no petty thing, I really love her, and I can't imagine my life without her!
Please if you have any advise.
(I cant do very much, I am not really allowed to go out at all.)
Added 3+ months ago:
Update:
Ok. I will be able when I am 18. But for the time being, I could only invite her to our house, for a meal, and play some board games or something like that. My mom just thinks its not the best idea to date while you are younger and in her words "can't do anything about it." (Like getting married, or start to have a serious relationship)
But since I don't know her to well, and it would just seam strange, to invite her to our house. I would feel rather uncomfortably with all of my younger siblings around (I am currently the Oldest one home)
I am involved in Martial Arts, so I do get out of the house, and I have tried to get her to come join there, but she did not seam very interested, but then again, she also does.
Really it's mostly I just can't date, but I only see her in Sunday.
We talk for a little bit, each Sunday, but she leaves pretty fast, so I don't have a chance to ask her many questions.
And I did get her to join the Church Choir, so I will see her when we Practice.
Any other advise?.?
Added 3+ months ago:
Update (again)
Ok and when I meant can't really go out at all, I mostly meant with other people.
Added 3+ months ago:
Well I finally was allowed to ask her out!!!! And she said yes!!!
Although she will be going to college next year (about 5 states away) I think I will be able to go there to!
The East coast has become a great place to live!!
Added 3+ months ago:
I am also now going to the same school as her!! It's great!!!
Added 3+ months ago:
*West Coast*
It may not be what you want to hear but I think you're doing all you can. Inviting her to join the choir was a good move. The thing is, even if you got very close, to the point of being boyfriend and girlfriend, you wouldn't be allowed to be (yet) so I think you may have to settle for a loose connection with her.
Mmm..... I guess you are right. There is not much I could do right now anyways. But see she leaves during the summer to go be with her aunt. Then she will be back around August, so I won't see her for a few months. And then she goes to college next year, I don't have much time, in the long run. I will turn 18 around March, next year, so I guess after that, I will be able to take her out, but that's still a year away.
Well, thank you for the advise!!
Oh, and we have an anniversary for my the Martial Arts school I am in, and my mom said I could invite her to it, but she also thinks it might seam like a date. Would that be a good move or a bad move?
Thanks.
*Anniversary Dinner*
Thinking about this again, is there any chance you could speak to your parents and suggest that maybe it's not a good idea for you to go from no dating at all to suddenly being thrust into it with little experience. Maybe that it's better for you to dip your toe in the water but in a semi-supervised way. You're 17 soon and you should at least have some concessions here to allow you to at least build a close friendship with this girl and to give you some life experience.
As for asking this girl to the dinner, it does sound like a date but maybe if you specified it was as a friend you could have something a little like a date but without it actually being a date. If nothing else, it would be good experience of being around girls and knowing how to talk to them. I know I'm not your parent and I can't make decisions for you, but I honestly think it would be a positive thing for your parents to be a little flexible here.
Yeah... Maybe. I have tried talking to my mom, I have not said anything to my (stepdad) or my dad. I don't think my dad would care that much, but he does not live close to us, so he can't really say much in saying I can. There is not much in the way I can think of convincing my mom. She really only thinks its good to date if you are planning on marrying the person you date, and since you can't at 16, or 17 it's not a good idea to date. I disagree (although when I am old enough, and I get to know her better, I have a feeling I would ask to merry me. So it's not like I would just date every girl I know), but I can't really do much about it. I will keep trying to convincer her some.
And the things we would do is just like going to a movie, or bowling, or dinner, not any parties or anything my mom would have to worry about. I don't know.... Sometimes all I can do is think about her.....
There is a Youth Conference coming up soon, but she will be at her aunts by that time, but she said she would try next year. (I was really hoping she would come, it would have been a perfect time to get to know her a little better)
I think I could make it seam like a more of a friend thing and less like a date (and my mom is fine with me asking her).
Just the big thing for me, (see we are homeschooled. And I don't really have a problem with that.) but she goes to public school, so I don't know if there is some other guy she likes, or a guy that likes her. I want her to know I like her, before she just kind of.... thinks nothing of me, and goes to like some other guy. (And I don't know is she dates either.)
I am really confused about this kind of stuff, because I have never felt this way before.
Thanks for your help!! I really appreciate it!!
(The things people will talk about to complete strangers, rather them their own family.)
Thanks for all the advice!!
Thanks for the advise, check my update to my question, if you would.
Thanks!!