Hello,
I have a dilemma. I have been married to a wonderful, kind, committed man for 10 years. He is everything one could ask for in a husband. The problem is that I don't know if I've ever been truly attracted to him. This feeling began when we were just dating and has nagged at me on and off during our marriage. I was attracted to my husband because of his sense of humor, his kindness, his love towards his family. I guess you could say we had and have emotional and intellectual chemistry. However, I have never been attracted to his body. In fact, I have always preferred to see him with his shirt on rather than off. This is not because he is fat or flabby... I've just never felt attracted to his body.
This has been a point of shame for me for many years, even before we married. The truth is I never felt like I could let him go because he was such a wonderful person. I couldn't think of a better person to get married to, in spite of not feeling a real physical attraction for him. Now, unfortunately, I am beginning to feel attracted to other men...men who I feel physical chemistry for, not just emotional chemistry. I'm beginning to wonder if I made the wrong decision by marrying someone I consider my best friend in the world. Many people will say that the body changes with age so it doesn't matter if you're physically attracted or not. But my problem is that the things that made me feel unattractive years ago are only becoming more magnified. I'm not sure what I should do. Any advice would be greatly appreciated !
Hello, I have a dilemma. I have been married to a wonderful, kind, committed man for 10 years. He i?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by Kristen2004
- Topics:
- man, year, husband, wonderful, years, everything, married, dilemma
Responses (2)
Lets be realistic.....“ideal” mate refers to a spouse that is flawless, possessing no negative traits. The pursuit of such a mate is vain for two reasons: First, such a person does not exist. (Romans 3:23) Second, the quest to find such a mate focuses on what one will get from a marriage rather than what one will give to it. In this regard, even some married people have the unrealistic goal of turning their spouse into their vision of the “ideal” mate. In contrast, a solid marriage is made up of two people who acknowledge each other’s imperfections but are still able to “continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely.”—Colossians 3:13.(jw.org)
The qualities you described your husband has is what women of the world yearn for yet you are looking on his physical. The fact you overlooked his physically imperfections before marriage you would not have married him. The problem is not with your husband it is with you. Maybe you are looking for an excuse to commit adultery. Adultery brings deep emotional pain especially for the one who has been faithful. If after you have committed adultery and your husband separate or divorce you can you imagine the guilt you will have to live with for the rest of your life even if he forgives you. Think of the pain of your family members. Sometimes we take things for granted and not appreciating the gem they had until they lose it. Think deeply of what your reason for magnifying his physical imperfections, you may be going through a mid life crisis, then seek medical help. You need to look at marriage in the light of the originator of the marriage Jehovah God, not by the world's standard.(comment Eujenny)
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