Having doubts about Islam. Should I leave ?

Question

I've been a believer on Islam for almost 4 years now. I learned about Islam from a coworker and also someone i used to mess around with. I started to follow everything. I wore the headscarf for almost 2 years. I fasted. Prayed. Attended Islamic events. I attended all these events with new friends I found. My life changed completely. But for some reason I'm losing everything. I also have been teaching my little sisters about Islam but lately they have been telling me they don't want to practice Islam (15.12yrs old) they feel weird. Before they really enjoyed it but now I feel like it's a burden for all of us. I'm 19 by the way. I'm turning 20 in a few weeks. We'll back to the topic I'm just losing SOOO MUCH FAITH OMG. I feel miserable . I was so Inlove with the teachings of Islam and when I used to hear the athaan it was like blood pumping in my heart it was so comforting but now it's just ugh. So difficult.i have so many questions please help.

1) it's haram to worship objects/items etc. but how weird is it that to pray we have to face toward Mekka? Isn't that worshiping some how because we're praying towards the kabbah (box)

2)  why is it that I never heard of MUHAMMAD (pbuh) in any other holy books only in the Quran?

3) Islam is only 1400 years old. What happened to all the previous of thousands of years?

4) I speak a little bit of Arabic, and yeah I pray in Arabic. But why must we learn Arabic to pray and feel decent to be in the mosque to understand the sheikh. Why can't it just be English everywhere. Why must Arabic be EMPHASIZED SO MUCH.


I don't know I don't feel very comfortable in the Muslim community anymore. But I'm also so embarrassed to come out and say yeah I'm not Muslim anymore after so much fight to be a Muslim in a catholic family. I'm just so embarrassed. Was this just a huge mistake. Please help me please I'm going crazy . I SERIOUSLY AM OMG PLEASE.

Answer

Good grief - don't get yourself in such a state over this.  

I am not religious at all so I can only give you an unbiased opinion that does not lean toward any one particular faith over another or indeed toward no faith at all.

There is one thing about religion that applies to all of them without exception and that is that we are all free to choose any faith we like.  We are free to worship whichever God we so choose or to worship no God, follow no religion.    We also have the right to question our religious beliefs and it's teachings.  Faith is personal, subjective and open to all manner of interpretation.  Nobody has the right to tell you what you should or should not believe.  Religion is not based on factual scientific proven data.  The holy books are not factual and therefore are neither right or wrong.

All of the questions you've asked can be answered by by just about anybody including me and each time you will get an entirely different answer.  Ask 6 people the same question and you will get 6 different answers.  It is what you believe that is important and if you finding that you are having problems with this, then deal with your feelings in your own time and free of pressure from others.  Your faith, your choice, your right to decide.

Finally and my last words.  So you spent loads of time and energy converting to Islam and I am guessing against the wishes of your parents/family who are practising Catholics.  Wow, I bet that was a barrel of laughs from the word go!  Nevertheless when you did that, you did it with conviction.  Nobody was able to tell you what to believe back then. Granted, it must have caused friction in the household and I am sure nobody was pleased with your choices as is the nature of religion in general.  But you know what, none of this stopped you then.  

None of this has been a huge mistake, none of it.  You have the right to change your mind at any point at any time and on any subject of your choice and you have the right to do it as many times as you wish.  And some people won't like it and may even voice negative opinions and that is their right to do so as well.  Other people don't have to agree with what you are doing as long as you know you don't require approval from anybody.

If you don't want to be a Muslim any longer then don't be one.  It really is as simple as that.  Who cares what you believed 5 years ago or last week,  Nobody has been hurt in the process have they?  Nobody is going to drop dead because you stop following Islam.  The world will not stop turning and you will not be cast into hellfire and damnation for eternity.

Do exactly what you want to do. That is the beauty of faith.  You can believe whatever you like as long as it makes you happy.

Answer

you should do what your gut tells you to do,but as a person raised in an islamic country  I can answer some of your question .

1. in islam they pray toward the kaaba just for show our unity but you may pray facing where ever you want

2.they say it was written in an old bible about muhammad but as far as I know that bible has  banished 

3. Quran says Allah has sent 24000 prophets before Mhammad

4.there is no pushing to use arabic and/or to learn arabic . you just most know how to pray and say prayers you can say everything else in English . as Rumi says "say whatever you want to say in any way you want to say it "

in the end ... every religion says the same thing ...first you make sure that you want to have a religion
if you chose to go after islam ,read quran and religious book specialy books about E'rfan(عرفان)

Answer

I am so sorry for you to be in this situation, it pains me to see you like this. First, the Kaaba is the house of God and it shows us all praying to God. We are NOT praying to the Kaaba.
Second, Muhammed was mentioned in the Bible but its hard to find, some say he was under the name Ahmed. Also, the Quran was made during Muhammeds life, thus, logically, as the Quran is the last book, he was born after the bible and torah were made.
There were other Prophets preaching Islam before Nabi Muhammed and it was only the Quran and the religions official reveal 1400 years ago.
Fourth, you are not required to learn Arabic except that necessary for Salah. Also, it is Mustahab to learn other arabic for more duaa and quran but it is in no way necessary. Most islamic scholars and islam originated in the arab world so arabic is their primary language. It is possible to find it in english so do so if possible. 
Do not take this as a final answer as I am no Marjaa. Ask your marjaaa who you follow and you will find more accurate and explained answers.

Having doubts about Islam. Should I leave ?

Responses (3)