I have a very sensitive and low self esteem, and my boyfriend is always criticising me. So I asked him if he could express his love more often so I could feel less like crap and more like a special person for him. His answer was something like 'This kind of thing spoils a relationship. Saying you love someone loses it's meaning through time.'
Is it true ? Cause I feel like it is just some excuse or some trauma from past relationships, and I still wish he could change his mind, since it really bothers me!
Frequently expressing your love spoils relationship ?
- Posted:
- 3+ months ago by Something...
- Topics:
- love, boyfriend, sensitive, always, express, relationship, self, relationships
Details:
Responses (2)
he believes what he wants my book saying i love you means the world to me hearing it means just as much in my book others believe different but yea you should hear that more so then not it doesn't destroy a relationship that i know of i say it all the time and it doesn't destroy one that i know of it doesn't spoil it either
There is no limit to how many times to say I love you, however I think it could get annoying if you did it 50 times a day. And maybe if he feels he has to say it, it may spoil it for him because now he feels it is a requirement. I am someone who is quiet about those things and holds back, unless it is just the right moment. I love my husband, but I don't say it more than twice a day typically(sometimes more soetimes less). That doesn't mean I don't love him enough, or that I dont show it in a variety of different ways. Your bf might feel unspontaneous, forced, or weird being told that. I know it's hard, but you need to look at the things he does and see that as showing of love. Does he hug you or even grin/light up when he first sees you? Does he do small sweet things? Sometimes that is how people feel comfortable showing they care. Maybe remind him that every once in awhile it would be nice to hear certain things.
On the other side, your demand or rather your request is perfectly acceptable. No one wants to only be criticized, and everyone wants to hear sweet nothings as well. If he is completely unwilling to make more of a commitment to share loving thoughts, well I apologize, but it doesn't sound like a good direction for a relationship if you ask me. If hearing certain things are important to you, shouldn't he want to honor it? It's not like your asking for marriage or babies. If he cares he should not not be able to, but should want to show you every so often how he feels. Sorry, I'm guessing this isn't help, but there are 2 perspectives.