I am 16, and I always feel like I have nothing to do, I am always bored and spend 90% of my time on my computer wasting time everyday to keep my mind off things and just to pass the days.
I feel like I want to do something, something new, but I just cant be bothered, or do not have enough self-confidence/esteem to do new things. I have very serious confidence issues and find it hard to talk to new people, or even talk to people on the phone who I don't know. I have tried tackling this by talking to people on Skype from the Internet who I play online games with, however I don't feel like this has helped because I can never find what to say, and it often ends in awkwardness making me feel worse.
My mum is an alcoholic and it angers me a lot when I have to see her drunk every single night, I have asked her to get help, I have tried to help her, but nothing has worked. She went to the doctors but I think she stopped, and she is in total denial about the situation, she is sometimes drunk at 8am.
I have tried self-harming around 3 times, I do not know why... I feel like I am doing it for attention or something which sounds really sad and stupid. I have told a few people about this, 1 person from school and 2 people from the internet. I do not feel like this has helped me at all and I don't really know why I did it.
What should I do?
I do not want to speak to a counselor or anything.
if you ever need someone to talk to, idk you but im willing to hear you out.